Meditation Classes

WE ALL LIE

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Why do I lie so much, and why should I care if I lie?

Most of us lie most of the time.  We all tell big lies, little lies, white lies, red and black lies… we tell all kinds of lies.  We don’t think much about all this lying, we seem to think that this lying is like taking a shower, something you do and often.

Yet, lying has profound consequences on how we live, on how we interpret life and on how we relate to our human fellows.  It establishes the color and tenor in all our relationships and in how we connect with ourselves and the world around us.

There are all kinds of lies, from huge lies that can impact our life in profound ways such as denying a crime we have committed, to medium lies like pretending you care when you don’t, to smaller lies like stealing an apple at the grocery store.  But regardless of the size and weight of our lies, they all leave a scar in our integrity, and if left unchecked, in the long run they lead us to a chaotic life. 

To lie is to intentionally mislead others when they expect honest communications. 

It is a non-very subtle form of betrayal, and it surely corrodes the level of trust between friends. The liar, if she has any awareness of the fact that she is lying, imagines that she is not harming the other person in as long as her lie goes unnoticed.  She will mostly give you long winded or convoluted excuses of why she did what she did to avoid embarrassment, to exaggerate her abilities, to disguise wrongdoing, to spare your feelings, to pretend what she is not, and or to get out of a situation. 

We sometimes become so used to lying and just saying whatever will get us to where we want to be, that we don’t even realize we are lying. 

The deceit of lying becomes so ingrained in our psyches and behavior that many many times, we don’t even know we are lying.   

When I say I will call you back, that I will return your book, that I will check on your email, that I will look into your question, that I did not see you, that I did not have it, and so on, with no real intention of doing it, or truth to back it up, I am deceiving and I am lying to you.   And lying is a breach of trust, and it is damaging to any relationship, not only because of the inherent deceit but also because it implies the arrogant stance of thinking that I am so smart that I can cheat you.

I am not exaggerating the severity and the deep implications that lying has in our life mainly because it corrodes our happiness and our wellbeing.

But the next time, right as you are about to make an excuse, or about to share a belief, or take a stance on a group decision, stop for a moment and check your motivation. Check what is the intention behind your action verbal or not.  Check what is the purpose of your interaction.  Give yourself some space to decide if it is aligned with your integrity, your truth and your desire to connect to what is honest, then, once you decide, proceed with full awareness

Ask yourself whether you are about to strengthen your sense of honor, integrity and dignity, or whether you are strengthening  your sense of deceit and dishonor.

Although lying is popular, honesty is the biggest gift we can give others and ourselves.  Once we commit to it and we live by it, it becomes a source of power. 

We need to emulate those wise and compassionate human beings marked by sterling honesty who have made a mark in the history of humanity.  We can do it.  We can start right now by learning to pay attention to what we are doing and thinking and by practicing to become aware of what is our own truth at any given moment.  

We will learn not to compromise our integrity and we will thus allow the best of us to shine through.  We will start a new world!

Love and light,

Monica


YOU HAVE CROSSED THE BRIDGE. YOU ARE IN NEW TERRITORY. SO WHAT DO YOU DO NOW????

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YOU HAVE LEARNED TO MEDITATE.  

YOU MEDITATE DAILY.

YOU ARE ON THE OTHER SIDE.  

YOU ARE IN NEW TERRITORY.

SO…..WHAT DO YOU DO NOW????

You are on the other side of the river.  You have started to acquire a new awareness, a new way of looking at “reality”.  You understand the futile circularity of your thinking process.  You are beginning to discern what is important from what is not important.  You get a glimpse of how much the voice in your head is getting you no-where. 

In a word, your mind is leaner and you are wiser.  You feel a bit happier but you also realize you are becoming a different person.  What was important yesterday is not relevant today, what was drama and hysteria is now an experience to go through, what was judgment and anger are becoming something slightly more subtle.  You realize that you have shed stuff you were familiar with.  Stuff that made you who you thought you were for decades.  You are on the other side of the bridge looking back at that familiar face that is paling little by little. 

And… you panic!  The grass may be greener here but you are not that sure of who you are in this new territory.  You realize that most of what gave you confidence and a sense of belonging is becoming quite irrelevant in this new world. 

You understand that the little you have explored through your meditation practice has given you beautiful moments of deep peace, fragrant whiffs of new ways to love, tentative sharp insights that surprise you, glimpses of kindness that turn you happy.  You know it is the real you in a beautiful land and yet….  so much newness makes you uneasy. The uncertainty of the newness, of the novelty, of the change, is unsettling you.

Paradoxically, you also start noticing a bit of fear creeping into your mind..., the fear that all this growth and newly acquired joy might disappear.  You realize you don’t know how to work with it or what else to do to make it permanent.  

You wish there is something you can do to not only keep your meditation practice strong but also to strengthen your connection to the new You and to your new Life. 

And I believe you are right! You need other tools, techniques that will complement your meditation and will integrate your quiet practice with your active life with a renewed sense of reverence and sacredness. Something else that will deepen the intention you bring to your meditation so that it will permeate all aspects of your life.

There are many many tools:  rituals, devotional chanting, ceremonial participation, retreats, yoga, breathing exercises, etc., all beautiful enhancers of any spiritual path, but I believe that there is one in particular that is absolutely essential to give deep meaning to your spiritual unveiling and growth: PRAYER.   

Prayer is the ultimate “technique” you need in order to navigate the new territory you have started to acquire.  When you learn what it is, what is an authentic prayer, a powerful prayer, and you learn to use it, you will begin to feel its grace pouring over you.  You will know that you have arrived.

In my next posts, we will dive deeply into the realm of prayer.  Stay tuned!

In the meantime, I would love to receive your comments, your questions, suggestions, scrawl down to the comments box, or you can send them to:  info@monicabelizan.com


Love and Light!

Monica

To go into more depth on what to expect when you start to meditate and how to become the happiness you are meant to be, check out my new book:  HAPPINESS NO Matter What!